Gifts

December 12, 2008

As the students remind me on a regular basis, Holiday Break is just a week away. In families and in schools, this time of year generates lots of excitement and anticipation: staying up late and sleeping in, play dates, visiting and/or visitors, movies, wonderful food, and most of all, lots of fun. The excitement on campus this time of year is palpable. We are all looking forward to the holidays and a break from our normal routines—faculty/staff and students alike.

The holidays for many are also a time for exchanging gifts, whether it is Christmas, Chanukah, or Kwanzaa, the exchange of presents is often involved in some way or another. For some it means making lists and hoping to get a few of your top choices. Others like to be surprised. In the gift- giving category, some want to get you what you want while others want to give you what they want to give you. And some make gifts with each recipient in mind. Regardless, thoughtful gifts that are exchanged with care are incredibly meaningful to us all….. And while I could go on about this exchange, I want to take an abrupt turn.

During this Holiday Break, despite the lists and the pleas for this new toy or that new game, remember that the most cherished gifts you can give your children this season are what they can’t quite voice: your time and your attention. That’s all they really want. It’s all they really care about. When they muss and fuss, are extraordinarily needy, regress in shocking ways, or prod siblings beyond belief, take a deep breath before joining in the anger/frustration dance. Most of the time what they are after is your attention and presence.

In other words, don’t get so focused on the end result this holiday season—the gourmet dinners or the perfect presents—that you lose sight of how you get there. That is, the best moments often happen when you are betwixt and between: standing in line together at Target; shopping in the grocery store; trying a new recipe for chocolate chip cookies; taking a leisurely walk around the neighborhood. Don’t miss these moments because you are too focused on the future. In fact, be on the lookout for these moments—they abound during the holiday season. And our students, your children, cherish these moments more than their words can ever express.

Have a great Weekend

Mike